How “I Hate Meetings” Can Be Hurting Your Leadership

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When you say, “I hate meetings!”, your team could be receiving a message that might be damaging your culture more than you ever realized.

In recent years a virtual “movement” has sprung up in leadership circles where it has become increasingly fashionable to announce, “I hate meetings!”

Often this sparks a dialogue that sounds something like this;  “Oh ya?! I hate them more!” “Well I REALLY hate meetings!”

When You Say ‘I Hate Meetings’ Your Team Hears Something Different.

Leaders, whether we’re talking about Zoom meetings or in-person gatherings, we need to stop saying this. Because when we say, “I hate meetings”, what our teammates hear is, “I don’t want to spend time with these people.”

Really.

Think about it. If you overhear your team leader look at their appointment calendar and say, “What? Another meeting with the team? Why do I have to always meet with these people?” you could easily translate that ranting into, “I just don’t like spending time with them.”

It’s Not About Good Meetings vs Bad Meetings

Now, many leaders will protest at this point and will say, “It’s only bad meetings I don’t like.”

Fair point. And there are thousands of books and articles written about how to hold good meetings. This is not one of those articles.

Do They Know How You Really Feel?

When your team believes you don’t like having meetings, they believe you don’t want to spend time with them. And it hurts your team’s culture, and ultimately their performance.

Your team runs on the fuel of your personal approval and even affection for them. In fact, your team runs on the fuel of your love for them.

And one of the surest ways to pop that balloon is to make it known that you don’t like spending time with them.

So, by all means, make sure your meetings are effective, well-run and purposeful. Whether on Zoom or (eventually) in person, even if your meetings suck, don’t let your team know you don’t like to meet with them.

Let them know that the highlight of your day is to be able spend time with them.

And let’s turn those “I hate meetings” chants into “I love my team” rants.

the author

Scott Cochrane

Lifelong learner, practitioner and coach of leadership, across more than 50 countries. Follower of Jesus, husband of Nora, grateful parent and grandparent.

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